August 26, 2009


This is one of the most basic qualities that a Dom/Master needs. One who is not confident cannot properly dominate another. It is just that simple.

Before going any further, we will reveal why the pretenders do not have what it takes to succeed in this area. Many seem to be confident by telling you how great they are. Those who demand they be called "Master" show how little they really have. Being a Master is more than just the way you are addressed. In fact, the failure to address one in that manner does not make one any less dominant. Yet, many will insist upon this because they lack confidence.

There is a big difference between being cocky and being confident. We have all met the former. Those are the ones who talk a big game yet are really nothing in the end. In short, their actions fail to live up to their words.

Leaders in all walks of life strive to instill confidence in others. This is a basic necessity for effective leadership. Those who pull this off succeed. On the other hand, failure to instill confidence can wreck a leader's career. Take the Presidency as an example. While the President is instilling confidence in people, the approval ratings are high and Congress is apt to side with him. However, once the confidence in the President slips, all start to bail. Thus the term "lame duck" President.

A Dom/Master needs to have the same approach. There is no way a sub/slave will follow someone who lacks confidence. It is something that he or she is looking for in the other person. Certainty is trait that is craved. A Dom/Master fosters a certain atmosphere by being confident in his decisions. Wavering is not something that subs/slaves like to see.

We all met those people who are confident (as opposed to arrogant). There is an aura about them. They are the people who others are attracted to. Regardless of the situation, they are the individuals who keep calm in the face of a storm. At the end of the day, they instill confidence in you.

This is what an effective Master does. Trust is build upon this confidence. Over time, a sub/slave comes to have confidence in her Dom/Master. It is something that can occur naturally. However, for this is take place, he must first have that confidence within himself. This is not something that can be bluffed. Without it, the D/s or M/s relationship is doomed to fail.

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BlueEyes69 on August 26, 2009 at 10:35 AM said...

You've just defined why I trust Jay and love submitting to him. His confidence -- in himself, in me, in us -- inspires me to please him in every way!



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