August 3, 2009

Respect For A Master

It seems to me that many believe the only qualification to be a Master is to establish a profile in a chat room (with capital letters) and say that you are a Master. This means that anyone who is a sub is automatically required to show you respect. It is something that comes along with the position. Once again, virtual strays from reality.

I witnessed this same behavior at munches. Any fool can show up and claim to be a Master. Thus, he expects people to respect his position. It matters little that this person never was in a M/s relationship nor have any knowledge about our lifestyle.

These scenarios are played out everyday. Let me ask you a question: does someone deserve the title "Doctor" just because he or she says so. Of course not. The title is acquired after years of schooling and passing the proper testing to receive certification. The same is true for attorneys, accountants, and reverends. Before one can call oneself something, knowledge and experience is required.

My journey into the chat rooms are always for research purposes. I am amazed how people think what they are doing is real. I see sub calling every dom in there Master. What is that? How many Masters does she have? The only ones who call me Master are the ones who submitted to me. To all others I am Sir. That is showing respect for the position without disrespecting the one who actually owns her.

So, why do people refer to another as Master without knowing if that person is worthy of that title? This shows the online insanity that exists out there. Would you go to a doctor without knowing if they had the proper certifications to practice medicine? Would you give one who only thought about going into medicine two days ago the title of doctor. Most likely not.

The bottom line is that respect is something that is earned through actions. I can claim to be whatever I want to be. However, to earn respect, especially from another who is in that field, I better know what I am referring to. The same is true for the M/s world. Trust me when I tell you that those who are real time Masters can see through many who are pretending. Virtual is not reality. Reality starts when you are in the same zip code.

My message today is to resist the temptation to pay homage to someone just because he says he is worthy of it. If you encounter one who demands that from you in a chat room, simply ask him to list his qualifications as a Master. You would like to know how many have submitted to him and consummated the relationship by actually getting in front of him in person. Also, you are interested when he first got into the lifestyle and what lessons he learned over the years. Finally, ask him how he transitions from online into real time. Then, if you are provided satisfactory answers, then you will show him the respect that a Master deserves.

By the way, if you see me in a chat room anywhere, you can refer to me as Dennis. After all, it is my name.

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Anonymous said...

I understand this well, and even have a hard time calling other Dominants "Sir", before I know much about them. I used to love bdsm chatrooms and now I find them silly. But I do enjoy chatting and I love speaking with like-minded people.

Well done!

Anonymous said...

I love your take on this concept. I am a female domme and I hate how online has made people lazy in their respect for the Master / Sir concept or the Mistress / Ma'am concept.

Love your writings. Keep up the good work!


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