October 22, 2009

Dabbling With BDSM


Often people think that the BDSM lifestyle is an all or none proposition. In reading the writings of many online, and including my own writing in there from time-to-time, it can be understood that one needs to fully commit to live this way of life or not enter into it.

This is a complete untruth. People can approach this lifestyle in whatever way they deem fit. Many times I write my assertion that there "is no one size fits all" methodology. Saying that there is the equivalent of one proclaiming there is only one way to be successful in marriage. This is a total myth. Each marriage is different; ergo every BDSM relationship is unique.

People, especially couples, often start by dabbling in this way of life. Many feel a certain urge in a particular direction but are unsure the full extent of that desire until they actually experience it. For example, many like the idea of being spanked but do not understand how much until it is felt. This is one of the more common ways to get into this way of life. Light bondage is also the other way that newer couples start to experiment with BDSM.

There is nothing that says you have to like or dislike any aspect of the lifestyle. You are free to go as far as you like with it. Some prefer the extreme facets while others opt to just "dabble" a little with their partner periodically. The bottom line is to do those things that make you happy. BDSM offers a lot to those who do the self searching to realize what excites them.

Taking a slow approach is usually the best track to follow. If both of you are new to this, I suggest doing a bit of research online by visiting many different websites to get a feel of what it is all about. On the other hand, if one of you has experience, I always mention to proceed with caution for the benefit of the newer person. This is magnified if the experienced one is dominant. Safety, especially psychologically, is of the utmost importance.

So, begin to dabble to see what interest you. Do not feel the need to commit to everything all at once. Over time, you will uncover what truly interests you. Some want to be a sex sub, others a full time slave. And, there are people in between those two areas. We welcome all flavors of BDSM so long as it works for you.

Click here for your version of An Owned Life.

1 comments:

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