Dedication To The Lifestyle

How dedicated are you to this way of life? This is something that few every consider but I believe is extremely important. Many seem to feel that BDSM is something that they will "try" to see if they like it. While I am an advocate of experimentation, I often wonder how true to this calling people are.

We live in an "alternative" lifestyle. Thus, we are ostracized by the majority of society. Most are too closed minded to understand or tolerate the decisions we make. Instead, they want to implement their belief system upon us. This creates an "us versus them" mentality.

There are many who put themselves out there over the decades for alternative lifestyles. In the United States, I would say that society is more tolerant than at any other point during my life. That said, there is still a long way to go. The gay community made great strides yet society is still lagging in the areas of polygamy, M/s, and communal living. Their prejudices still exist.

Does that mean that everyone who is involved in BDSM is an advocate? Of course not. Most go about their daily lives without a thought of the bigger picture. That is natural and, often, the most helpful way to be. Anyone who lives this way of life, no matter the style, is promoting this way of life. Most do not have the makeup to be activists promoting freedom in all areas of our life.

However, those who are living this way on a daily basis are committed to it. I see far too many who act like they are testing the water. BDSM is not a filler to make up for shortcomings in other areas of your life. It is something that we choose to engage in response to a strong inner desire. Dominant persons are lured by the need to control while submissive types absolve themselves of this need. We each are filling an inner calling.

There are some who are revolted at the thought of being tied up while others who get sexually aroused by it. This is a simple test that I use to determine one who is dominant versus submissive. Follow your desire with this idea and you will have your answer.

This is a way of life that requires dedication. There are many pitfalls along the way. We are dealing with human interaction. The ones that want to throw in the towel at the first sign of difficulty show their insincerity to the lifestyle. They end up revealing that they were just "tire kickers".

So, the question is "are you in or out"? What was it that drew you to this way of life? Is it something that is still present or were you running from something else? Submission and domination do not change. If either of these emotions is strong within you, then this is the way of life for you. I have yet to uncover another lifestyle that allows the absolute exchange of power required to fulfill the inner desire that each of us has. If you know of one, please email me.

Decisions have consequences. Think hard about what it is that attracted you to this way of life in the first place. You will find that, if the reasons were valid, they still are present. However, if you were enticed because this was different from the traditional way of life that you knew, you might find that this is no different than what you dealt with before. Sometimes it is imperative to look at the common denominator in all your life choices. And that denominator is you. Perhaps that is where you should start place your focus.

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