January 16, 2010

Safe Words

Much is written about the use of safe words. There are many different ways to approach this aspect of the lifestyle. I believe the particulars that are used are less important than the fact that they are implemented.

I feel that it is crucial to use safe words except in the most familiar situations. This is true whether one is referring to D/s or M/s. Unless there is a great deal of knowledge between the two individuals, safe words will prevent any unexpected "surprises".

My philosophy is that a safe word is necessary in every new relationship. Trust is important. However, it can be misplaced when people are new. It is impossible to truly know one's level of experience until you "see them in action". While one might claim to be a rope or electric play expert, don't bet your future on his or her words. A safe word allows you to back off if the scene gets too intense.

M/s is a bit different in that the relationship often covers a larger spectrum. Nevertheless, the same premise holds true. A safe word is vital until there is enough knowledge about each other. Trust really has nothing to do with this situation. Even if you trust the person, it might not be warranted in the area of extreme play.

BDSM is a fun lifestyle. However, there are instances where lives are ruined because someone failed to take the necessary precautions to ensure a safe time. A safe word is one of the basic tenets we operate with to ensure the safety and enjoyment of all involved. It is like a condom, while not the most enjoyable thing in the world it will protect you from all kinds of fungi. Cover yourself with a safe word.

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