October 16, 2010

Patience


I am continually amazed how most want to jump into a full-fledged TPE relationship within a few minutes of finding this lifestyle. It is baffling how people instantly believe that they are capable of living as a Master, Mistress, or slave without any knowledge about what this life is about. Most believe that since they were always dominant (or submissive) they are able to immediately get into a relationship. As many find out, this is incorrect.

Knowledge Takes Time

Knowledge is something that takes time to acquire. There are many ways to go about gaining it but the most common are by living through life lessons and reading. Sadly, most want to go out and get themselves some experience instead of spending the time reading and learning. A lot can be garnered by studying the wisdom of others. Following this route can also avoid many pitfalls.

Experienced people like to share their knowledge. We write posts on different sites for the benefit of newer people. This is where a lot of experience can be garnered. Through the words of others you can see their feelings, what they went through, and how they handle different situations. All this will play into your decisions about different aspects of the lifestyle.

Patience Is The Key

As mentioned, most seem to want to jump into a relationship immediately. My question is how do you know what you are even looking for on another person(s) if you do not understand your particular aspect of the lifestyle? Just because one believes he or she is dominant, that does not make them ready to be a Master or Mistress. By the same token, I see so many who proclaim themselves "slaves" without even an inkling what that truly means.

Just yesterday I was conversing with someone who is new and seeking information. The best suggestion that I had for her was to be patient while reading all she could. Get a variety of viewpoints about the life before making any decisions. It is crucial for one to determine where he or she fits before seeking someone to compliment that decision. I find that most reverse the process and add someone into the equation before deciding where he or she fits. This is the proverbial horse before the cart situation.

There is plenty of time to move forward and get yourself involved with another. However, in the intern, relax and try to learn as much as you can. This will alleviate a great many headaches down the road. Remember, getting into a BDSM relationship is easy compared to keeping one going. You can snow someone in the beginning. However, they will ultimately find out that you do not know what you are doing if that is the case. This is not something that can be faked.

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