March 8, 2009

Erotic Humiliation: Some Can

The mindset of a sub is vitally important when employing the technique of erotic humiliation. As mentioned in my book Erotic Humiliation, many suffer from psychological issues stemming from childhood. Abuse is a commonplace which too many fail to deal with. They are victims who never were able to get past those situations.

Getting involved in BDSM does not mean that we become psychologists. Nevertheless, it is important to understand how past abuses affect self esteem, self worth, and can impact all the decisions that one makes. Traveling down this road with one who lacks the mental makeup to enjoy it can have adverse affects. The damage caused can be irreversible.

Erotic humiliation is a technique that is designed to enhance a scene. Like much in the BDSM world, it walks the fine line of play and reality. The degradation of a sub is done within the confines of a controlled environment. This is what deparates it from everyday life. The parameters established allow him/her to enjoy the scene while not having the esteem affected.

I ran across a few who will take what a Dom says seriously. This is part of the process through the power exchange. However, a sub needs to be able to separate the scene from other aspects of her life. For example, just because a Dom tells her how worthless she is during the scene, that does not mean it is true in all areas of her life. Nobody is totally worthless. She might be a wonderful mother, successful executive, or tremendous citizen. Nevertheless, during the scene, the Dom might want to enphasize her worthlessness. The fact that it is not true will often allow the sub to have a heightened sexual experience.

BDSM contains a lot of fantasy. We often engage in activities that fulfill people's fantasies. This is one of the highlights of BDSM. Individuals can do things that they would not ordinarily do. Being degraded is something those with submissive streaks often dream about. Making this part of the play scene is a good way to fulfill this desire. Yet, there are those who can handle it and those who cannot. Be wary when touching upon this subject.

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