February 21, 2011

'Accept Me As I Am'

I was speaking with a local Master over the weekend. Him and I were 'comparing notes' on the lifestyle. One thing that came up in the conversation was the idea that many slaves have that a Master should 'accept her as she is'. Of course, this concept did not go over very well with either of us.

Before going further, I will state that this guy I was talking with is an 'old timer'. He is around this way of life for more than 40 years. While I acknowledge that time does not necessarily mean that one knows anything, the truth is there is no replacing experience. And this gentlemen has a great deal of it.


One fundamental idea of mine about the M/s lifestyle is that it is based upon TPE. Many seem to take this notion as incorrect. However, this is what I feel separates M/s from a standard D/s relationship. Under the D/s scenario, the submissive maintains some control over what occurs in her life. This is not the case when one elects to life M/s. Here we have a lifestyle which all power resides within the hands of the Master. The breakdown of power is very clear.

Without this power structure, I feel one is engaging in more of a role play scenario. While this is wonderful if it is what one is truly seeking, the truth is that many want to live the extreme control dynamic for real. This means that both commit to an unequal relationship in this area. My experience is that few can truly live this way of life. But, for those that do, they understand what I am about to comment upon.

Total Power

When one has total power over another, that means that all decisions are based upon what he (she) thinks. That is the advantage to living in such an arrangement. Quite simply the slave exists for the pleasure and benefit of the Master. Everything falls under this domain. Anything is subject to his (her) approval.

This brings up the point of the 'accept me as I am' philosophy. To start, I sense that anyone who is proclaiming this does not have the proper mindset to be a slave. Sure she (he) might well be submissive. However, a person who believes this is better suited for a D/s relationship. In that scenario, one has the preference to make that statement. In M/s, it goes against the grain.

Fundamentally, the notion that a Master needs to 'accept' something about a slave without the ability to change it is wrong. A slave knows that all of her (him) is for Master. This is the basic essence of the M/s interaction. The exchange of power means that he is free to alter whatever he does not like about a slave. This is an expectation that any true Master has.

Whether it is weight loss, hair color, or career choices, a slave is not the one who decides that. Once a person enters into a M/s relationship as a slave, she gives up the option of making her own choices. Remember this before you get involved in something that is too much for you to handle. There is nothing wrong with living in a D/s relationship if that is what you are suited for. Better to be happy (and safe) then try to attain a level one is not designed for.

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