February 15, 2015

Why 50 Shades of Grey Is A Good Thing


I am deviating from my writing about the primal which I posted yesterday with the promise of a follow up to put up something that I think is important to discuss.  We all know the 50 Shades movement is going full force.  Now I must start by stating that I have not read the books nor seen the movie yet.  However, I read enough reviews of the book by people in the lifestyle to understand what it is about.

50 Shades of Grey, for those who live under a rock, is a FICTIONAL BDSM romance novel that took the world by storm.  Millions of copies of the trilogy were sold making the writer a sensational to lonely housewives and those bored with their mundane relationships.  Of course, the fact that it is fiction ought to tell you something about the accuracy of the writing.  From what I heard, leaving the fact that it was poorly written in the view of many, this work was very successful at reaching the goal which was to stimulate the desires, emotions, and fantasies of the readers.  This work was not meant to reflect what true BDSM is about.  Therefore, we cannot look at it through the eyes of realism.

That being said, I am going to state that 50 Shades of Grey was a good thing for our way of life.  I state that knowing that our BDSM "dating" sites are going to be overwhelmed with people who really have no idea what this life is all about and have no desire to live it.  My retort to that is "how is this different from any other day?".  Simply cruise around the web visiting the different sites and you see the majority of people fit into this category anyway.  I started writing this blog a number of years ago to clear up some of the misconceptions that exist out there.   Nevertheless, we all know, from first hand experience, that the nitwits far outnumber the serious people.  Hence, I do not think we are going to see much of a change in that department.

What we might see happen is the numbers game starts to work in our favor.  What do I mean by this?  Most everything is statistical percentages.  Take any group and you can break them down into a number of categories.  No matter what the categories, if the group is large enough, a certain percentage will fit into each one.  This is true no matter how obscure the category is.  Reverting back to our plight in BDSM, 50 Shades of Grey moved BDSM into mainstream conversation.  This is a good thing.  No longer are we only talked about in the dark corners of society.  The thoughts and desires that many were having is not open discussion in coffee shops and water coolers.

Therefore, I am convinced that a percentage of the people who are exposed to BDSM via this avenue will, eventually, research and learn what is truly going on.  The seed was planted and the desires were flamed.  Yes, I agree most look at it in the same way lonely housewives read other romance novels.  Being divorced from reality means that most will not find anything resembling the book.  However, there is a category of 50 Shade readers/viewers who will delve deeper.  I do not know the percentage but even if it is 1/2 of 1%, that is a big number considering this film is reaching millions of people (as the books did).  I hypothesize we will have more people truly living this way of life in the future because of these works.  Of course, we will have to still sift through a lot of garbage to get to that point.

The bottom line is we never know what the trigger is within someone that will set him or her on this path.  Many of us were "inspired" by non-traditional avenues which ignited our search.  Over the years, I heard of people being intrigued by movies such as Planet of the Apes or Hostel.  We know the porn industry has done a great deal, both good and bad, to plant seeds within people.  Others were somewhat awakened by getting a spanking when younger.  My point is that no matter what the source, if one is stimulated to the point where he or she investigates this way of life in greater depth, then that can only help us.  Yes the vast majority who show up are going to be 50 Shade fools who are completely out of touch with what is going on.  However, one thing to keep in mind is that these works were not the first BDSM "romance" novels to appear.  Authors such as Chelsie Sinclair were writting BDSM novels for years.  Her works cannot be considered completely accurate either but they were instrumental in driving many people to this way of life.

In closing, remember the idea of percentages.  50 Shades of Grey is awakening millions of people to the fact that there is something different from the traditional model out there.  Yes, I know it is painting an unrealistic picture of our lifestyle but it is a work of fiction.  It is up to us to take the people who have an open mind coupled with a desire to delve deeper and point those individuals in the proper direction.  There are blogs and posts all over the place which convey accurate information on both the submissive and dominant side of things.  Point these people to these sources to aid them in their search.  Post the links on your profile pages on the different sites you are on in an effort to expose people to what you consider true picture of how we really are.  If all of us do a few things each day to enhance and expand this way of life, we can make an incredible difference.  The Internet, albeit with its shortcomings, is a terrific multiplier of information.  When we post a link, we have no idea who nor how many people will click on it.  Ultimately, things can take on a life of their own on this medium.  Do you part and get posting.

DN 

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