November 3, 2012

Dominating All Around You


Most of my posts are aimed at the submissive people in the lifestyle.  However, today, I am going to concentrate upon the dominant aspect of things.  While much of this will refer to the dominants, it is helpful for a submissive to ponder the ideas when seeking out another.  One who has the ability to apply these concepts might well be worth one's time.

  A Character Trait

Domination is not something that a person does.  Instead, it is a character trait that is deep within him or her.  Certainly this will manifest itself in action but it is imperative to realize this idea.  Like any other trait that is coded within us at the physiological level, it is not turned on or off.  No matter what is being undertaken, domination is always a part of this person.

Before moving along, we must take a look at the flip side.  Many people, especially online, feel that since one is dominant, that he or she (usually he in this instance) will be dominant in everything.  Well, life mandates this incorrect.  Anyone who professes to be this way is out of touch with reality and falls into the class of what I term a "pretender".  Everyone submits depending upon the situation.

If you are one who doubts this, let me offer up a few examples.  In the workplace, who is running the show?  Typically, the owner of the company.  It is his/her money do the right to call the shots goes along with this.  Part of the process is usually hiring managers who are entrusted with the authority to make certain decisions.  In their own realm, these people are the ones who have the control.  Now, depending upon where you fall on that scale, unless you are the owner, you have someone to answer to.  Enter into the workplace with your dominant self and tell the owner how you are in control.  I would imagine a pink slip would soon follow.

Another situation that many can identify with is the legal system.  This is an arena where the power structure is built into the physical surroundings.  Enter into a courtroom and you see who is in charge.  That person is termed "Your Honor" and sits above anyone else.  In that realm, the power resides with one person which does not happen to be you.  However, if you feel the need to test it, go head to head with the judge in a power struggle.  Contempt is a term they devised which describes this situation.  Submission is usually the preferred course of action in this setting.

Surroundings

Now that we established that it is impossible to be dominant in every situation, let us consider how one applies this characteristic in life.  As mentioned, domination is a trait that is resident within a person.   The way this emerges is through the actions one takes.  However, it is interesting to witness how applicable, or not, this really is.

Many seem to claim to be dominant and exemplify that when they enter into a relationship.  These individuals will lead you to believe that they are perfectly at home when ordering someone around.  Actually, this might be a truthful statement.  Being bossy is something these types can excel at.  Yet, this is not domination.  There is a lot more to being a success Dom/Master than just issuing orders.  Those who fail to realize this are not long for this lifestyle.

I often tell people to look at how one lives his or her life to determine exactly the level of domination this person has.  As you can guess, one who is truly dominant will have physical examples of this.  I often state that before one can control another, he must first control himself.  Seek out those areas which will under a lack of control on that person's part.  If you find this to be the case, you might want to reconsider your interaction with this person.

As a dominant person, I strive to take control over all areas of my life.  Physically I put the time in to create the best body I can.  Part of this quest is to remove the vices from my life that are harmful to my physically.  While I like cake just as much as the next person, I realize how counterproductive it is for me to put that in my mouth.  Financially is another area that I feel is crucial.  Through the gaining of knowledge, I developed different ways to enhance my income.  While the quest is not over, I am able to weather certain financial setbacks better than many because I do not overspend nor put myself in debt with things such as car payments and credit cards.  Finally, I monitor my emotional state.  Again, I will admit that I am not perfect, being apt to fall into a funk like everyone else.  However, overall, I try to determine my emotional state by being conscious of what I focus upon and how I process the events in my life.  Fear is something that can wreak havoc with one emotionally and learning to deal with this is paramount to growth (for those who want to claim they are never scared, the truth is every human experiences fear).

These are just a few of the areas that I seek to control.  A true dominant will exert that influence wherever he or she is able while understanding there are certain times where a subservient approach is the best (see Your Honor above).  Domination is not something that is done once in a while but in every action.  And, for those who really understand, life is nothing more than a series of actions.  Thus, there are times where the most dominating thing I can do is to excel at doing the dishes or whatever chore is in front of me.  Mastery over the minor activities in life will lead to mastery at higher levels.  This is the level to focus your attention upon. 

DH

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