February 24, 2009

Educating Yourself


There are many facts out there about the BDSM way of life. Unfortunately, there is as much fiction available too. This is one of the reasons why I write the articles that I post on here. My goal is to try to inform people as much as I can based upon my experiences.

I will never proclaim that book knowledge is any substitute for experience. We have all come across those people online who spew all kinds of wonderful knowledge that they read. Yet, never do they refer to anything in the first person. We can talk about the psychological impact of subspace all we want without ever encountering a real live Dom. Experience is the best teacher.

That being said, this does not mean that we should not educate ourselves about the BDSM lifestyle. This is especially true when one is new. There are many wonderful sites out there which will expose one to some of the basics about this way of life. Books are also a great help. It allows one to learn the different terminolgy commonly associated with different aspects of our life. This will give you more confidence when chatting with others.

Another thing that some basic knowledge allows one to do is to spot some who are trying to pretend to be more than they really are. Subs are truly encouraged to seek this experience. The more you can educate yourself, the better equipped you will be to deal with someone who pretends to be a Dom.

Through my writings, I try to educate as much as I can. That is why I wrote "An Owned Life". You can find a writeup about it here. (I know, cheap plug, but I got to do it). This publication delves into my experience with the M/s aspect of this lifestyle. It is based upon my experience over the past 10+ years.

There is also a forum which is free to sign up for which will allow you to interact with others who are also involved in BDSM. It is a wonderful place for new people to learn about what we are involved in.

Finally, there are some wonderful blogs (other than this one of course) which have people sharing their experiences. I suggest checking a number of different sites out to see what makes sense to you.

Remember, even if you are short on experience because you are new to this way of life, it does not mean that you need to be totally clueless. Educate yourself as best you can so that you are prepared to chat with others. If you can, find someone who is more experienced who can serve as a confidant to you. This is perhaps the most valuable secondhand experience there is.

Click here for your version of An Owned Life.

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